Okay… So I did it. I deleted 1000 people off of my Facebook account. Friends no more! Right? Not really. It’s strange that we live in a day and age that our social presence is more and more measured by our online presence. I’ve been running at about 1400 friends on Facebook for a while now. And honestly I was glad I had that many connections and figured I would keep them around for future work connections. But, I’ve recently been going through some changes and moves in my life and its caused me to reflect on how much I’ve held on to the resentments that are still active in my life.
Before doing the mass extermination, I was finding my news feed on Facebook was becoming more and more nonsensical and every once in a while a person would post a random status and it would cause me to remember that friendship and all the memories and circumstances surrounding that friendship. And while some of these memories are good, some posts by Facebook friends would remind me of times and situations that I’d really rather not remember anymore. And memories that, frankly, I needed to let go of and move on from. And the thing is, those memories tied with that person didn’t dictate what I felt about that person. I actually might have had a few good memories with them, but they would remind of a time in my life that I really needed to move on from.
Also, a lot of these people were Facebook friends from my time at college or even high school. And the funny thing is, several years ago when Facebook was still fresh, EVERYONE wanted to connect with EVERYONE they ever knew. I would be like, HEY! I remember “So and So” from college of course I’d like to say connected with them! But the thing is, I never really spoke to or knew this person, even when I was in college! It was a bizarre time and I’m sure we all went through that Facebook phase at some point.
So anyways, I’ve tried to simplify my life and grow into the person I feel God is leading me to be. And to do that I need to let some things go. BIGTIME. I really didn’t realize how much baggage I was carrying around just on Facebook alone. I was holding onto a lot of resentment and when I would try to let go of it, I would see another status update from “So and So” and I would be carried right back into that situation of years past, and remember all the pain that was associated with it. And all the while, “So and So” really didn’t have anything to do with those memories, but it was just that they were around in that time period.
Thing is, I might have been friends with “So and So” during that time period, and I didn’t really mind keeping up with their life now. But I had to let that online friendship go so I could move on. Now, if I saw “So and So” and the local Starbucks, would I love to talk to them and have a cup coffee and catch up? Absolutely!!! I’d love to continue a friendship in person. But I think for many of us, our online life’s have become far too cluttered. And honestly, I don’t think the human mind was meant to actively support 1000’s of relationship at the same time. Its how we cope, by letting people go and sometimes forgetting.
And while that may sound cold and sad, it’s a fact of life. So after the mass Facebook extermination I find I’m now connected with the people, family and friends that are current in my life. And I find I can manage that better than before. I feel I can move on from a great many things now. I don’t have to remember so many people anymore and “So and So” isn’t going to be always on my Facebook news feed reminding about it.
Also of note, if you’re considering doing what I did and find yourself with 1000’s of friends know that Facebook sadly doesn’t allow you to mass delete people any more. Facebook would rather have you delete your friends by going to each friend and pressing delete. So I wanted to let you know about a nifty little tool that I found through Google Chrome that allows you to MASS EXTERMINATE! It takes a bit to figure out, but just follow the directions exactly and you’ll be fine.
Here are the links:
Tamper Monkey (DOWNLOAD FIRST)
And it seems I’ve run out of Time Units…